I recently subscribed to Shudder, so I've been getting through quite a few movies. There's a lot of indie stuff, cult and world cinema on Shudder, which is where my interests lie usually anyway, so this service has been perfect for me. After each one I've been jotting down little reviews, and here's the first batch of them. All are on Shudder UK, except for Carrie (Netflix) and Fractured (Amazon Prime).
Carrie (1976) ★★★★★
The first ever Stephen King novel to get a film adaptation, Carrie is a horror classic. Before we had Eleven from Stranger Things, we had Carrie White slaying bullies with nothing but her mind. There's ultimately something quite sad and bittersweet about the original Carrie movie. The prom night scene is beautiful and heartbreaking all at once.
The Witch In The Window ★★☆☆☆
Holy low budget Batman. This wasn’t the worst movie I’ve seen. It had its moments which were mainly of the sentimental variety, and they made a go to hit, for better or worse. For a horror film though it was very light on chills, and instead presented itself as more of a father and son drama. Father was alright but son made me feel like I was watching an episode of Tracey Beaker or something with the overconfident ham acting. Some “aw bless” moments, but overall it’s difficult to recommend this one.
Sweet, Sweet Lonely Girl ★★★★☆
Quirky little arty film about a shy girl sent to look after her reclusive grandmother. When I say reclusive, I literally mean she will not open her bedroom door. It’s creepy as hell, especially when our heroine starts nudging hand mirrors under the door out of curiosity, trying to get a peek at granny. The movie evokes the whole 1970s gothic horror thing so well. Beautifully weird old house that’s obviously hiding some secrets, and a pretty yet awkward heroine, exploring her sexuality for the first time. It’s all there and with a delightful psych pop soundtrack to boot. A modern film made with this aesthetic I adore so much is quite the treat.
The Devil’s Candy ★★★★☆
“Gnarly” would be the best word to describe this enjoyable look at a familiar movie villain. You know, that one with the pointy red horns? The Devil’s Candy unashamedly flaunts its cliches and for that it gets away with a lot, possessing this ever present charm and warmth, despite it being about a family of metal heads and their brush with an underworld presence. The characters are likeable, so much so that you really find yourself caring about what happens to them. The movie boasts some unforgettable imagery as well, with perhaps one of the most chilling manifestations of Satan. It all gets very raw towards the end. If you like your horror with electric guitars and a bit of heart, then look no further.
Blood Feast ★★★☆☆
This film is famous for being the earliest example of exploitation cinema. By all means, Blood Feast is absolutely atrocious, but it’s the hilariously terrible acting, ridiculous plot involving an ancient Egyptian feast and a shed load of tomato ketchup gore that makes this movie quite the guilty pleasure. Got a new favourite quote as well in “He died a fitting death, like the garbage he was”. Can't wait to use that one on someone IRL. I'm not a fan of exploitation at all but when it's ridiculously campy (à la Rob Zombie), I can find it hard to resist.
Revenge ★★★☆☆
Brutal revenge story with an absolute kick ass lead lady. This was fun, stylish and beautifully shot, gifting some unforgettable imagery. At the same time though it was extremely unbelievable, which in itself shouldn’t matter cause it’s a movie, except this one put such a strong focus on the injuries, miraculous (think impaled on spike) recoveries, equally miraculous survival instincts that set in, and the pints and pints of spilled blood. It was hard not to think about just how ridiculously impossible the whole thing was. If there was some supernatural element at play it wouldn’t matter but that wasn’t the case. Entertaining and well done action for sure though, even if ultimately quite shallow.
Antiviral ★★★★★
We’re obsessed with celebrities today, but can you imagine a future where we inject ourselves with their diseases, and even eat our stars by way of lab cloned meat, all done in an effort to get us closer to our idols, to feel like they are a part of us? Well, that all happens in this trip of a film by Brandon Cronenberg (son of David Cronenberg). I’ve never seen anything like it visually, nor experienced its concept before. Caleb Landry Jones’ is ridiculously magnificent as Lucas Clinic employee, Syd March. I can’t imagine the film working as well as it does without his weird, pasty, ginger self haunting every scene. He’s a fascinating actor who pulls you into Lucas' feverish ride in a way that'll have you swaying through his every wheezing cough and staggered step.
Sun Choke ★★★★☆
One of the strangest movies I've watched in a while. It follows a psychotic woman called Janie. She's looked after by her lifelong nanny, Irma, who subjects her to some very strange therapy. Eventually Irma deems that Janie has made enough progress to be allowed out of the house by herself. Sarah Hagan's acting in this movie is something special. She brings a strangeness to the character of Janie that is hard to imagine being delivered by anyone else who could be put in the role. If you're interested in taking a look into a very extreme case of mental illness then this movie could interest you. It certainly won't be for everyone though.
Road Games ★★★☆☆
A super suspenseful thriller that keeps you on your toes until the very last minute. There’s a serial killer on the loose in France and our hitch hiker just wants to get home to England. The French/English language barrier thing here is part of what makes it such an intriguing watch. That and the whole “can we trust this person?” thing that’s present throughout its duration. My interest was strong from start to finish. Even if the conclusion was a bit far fetched and there were questions left unanswered. The ending of the film was wickedly cool though and introduced me to the tastiest piece of electronic music I think I’ve ever listened to (all hail Carpenter Brut).
Oldboy ★★★★☆
Bat poop crazy South Korean revenge film extravaganza. I didn’t realise until after it had finished that Oldboy is part of the Vengeance trilogy which includes Sypathy For Mr. Vengance and Lady Vengeance, the latter of which I watched many moons ago and left me feeling shocked and all icky afterward. Oldboy did exactly the same, and what a ride it was.
Fractured ★★★☆☆
Decently enjoyable British horror film with stunning cinematography, and a twist that will knock you out (I’m usually a demon when it comes to guessing shockers but this one totally threw me). The problem is the film suffers with pacing issues, forcing you to essentially watch the same string of events twice. At first you’re thinking “oh my gosh, cool”, especially as you’re reliving the night again with new, ultra chilling knowledge, but then the novelty starts to drag. You know everything that’s going to happen and the whole thing ends so abruptly. It’s a shame as this is some super intelligent horror. Still very much worth a go. Bonus points for it starring Ruby Allen from Eastenders. Glad to see her doing well.
Lost River ★★★★☆
A dark, apocalyptic fairytale from the wunderbar mind of Ryan Gosling. This extremely Lyncian debut is rich in strangeness, with some of the most memorable cinematography I’ve recently experienced. A psychopathic Matt Smith driving around, sporting a buzzcut and ridiculously shiny sequined shirt, is something I didn’t know I needed in my life. If you come in expecting the plot to be spoon fed to you, you’ll end up disappointed. This film is understated with what it expresses vocally, leaving the mind to wander as it attempts to slot the pieces of its puzzle together. My only critisim is that for a world and situation so interesting, the film really could have done with some extra minutes. The ninety it provided somehow didn’t feel enough. Such an intriguing watch though regardless.
Blood and Black Lace ★★★★☆
This vibrant “who’s the killer” thriller belongs to the Italian genre known as giallo. You’ve got a crime to be solved, a masked killer on the loose and a fashion house full of the most gorgeous models that you know aren’t probably going to last too long. The stunning colours that pop out at you brought to mind Dario Argento’s Suspiria. There’s something you just can’t beat when it comes to how these old Italian movies are filmed. I enjoyed Blood and Black Lace. I did make the mistake of watching it when I was really tired. These ladies are talkative and the subtitles were testing my patience (whyuspeaksofastItalins!?). It was fun trying to work out who the killer was. I pretty much spent the entire movie thinking it was the lady with the short black hair and incredibly evil looking eyebrows. Was it her? You’ll just have to watch to find out.
We Go On ★★☆☆☆
A man called Miles sets an ad in the paper, offering $30,000 to anyone who can show him there’s more to life after death. This of course invites a load of pranksters after a quick buck. Miles eventually narrows it down to three people whose footage interests him, along with a fourth man who telephoned him despite there being no phone number on the ad to contact (hmmm mysterious). We Go On had an interesting premise, but the execution was awkward, not helped at all by some very strange, almost ham-fisted acting (and when that ham is coming from the two characters with by far the most screen time.. oh boy). For a film that tackles the fear of death and the uncertainties of what happens to us next, I didn’t find myself particularly moved at all actually. I should have felt something, considering my own fears. The film wasn’t a total miss. The pasty Nelson played by Jay Dunn was a very well done character, and to be honest, the clear star of this whole thing. His time on screen was always a delight and salvaged what was otherwise a not particularly thrilling ride. An absolute thumbs down as well to the poorly done copy/paste
quickly flash something screaming on the screen jumpscares this movie decided it had a relentless fetish for about half way through. They literally made me drop a star from my ranking, not because they worked on me (they didn't) but because they were ridiculously lame.
Cold Hell ★★★★★
“That’s how you f***ing do a movie” were the exact scandalous words I muttered as the credits started to roll on this ridiculously stylish and effortlessly cool German/Austrian neo-noir thriller. From the get go we learn that Özge Dogruol is one miserable son of a gun. A resting bitch face to end all resting bitch faces that came before (need to up my game). Our Turkish taxi driving heroine is witness to a terrible crime, and after locking eyes from her apartment window with the sadistic killer, Özge herself is now a target. It sets a chilling tone very early on that almost never lets up. Besides there being someone out to kill her, Özge experiences casual racism, as well as sexism, the latter being dealt to in such satisfying ways (think extreme butt whoopery). To further add to Özge's suffering, her religious family are messed up. It’s clear she doesn’t want to be anywhere near them. The themes here, including the really touchy ones, are mostly tackled in ways that are naunced, and that’s something I appreciate deeply in art and literature. The characters are multilayered. Someone in particular early on whose interactions with Özge could easily be described as
challenging, later on redeems himself, and then some. We learn that person is flawed, but in the end not so bad afterall, and at heart a good person.
The action sequences in Cold Hell are thrilling and plentiful, and yet even outside of them there was never a dull moment, in big part thanks to leading lady, Violetta Schurawlow. For such a quiet, moody character, Özge is magnetic, and you absolutely care for her safety. This one's really good and very watchable. Check it out!
Favourite movies: Antiviral is the one that has stuck with me the most. I absolutely adored it, and haven't been able to stop myself from thinking about its premise. I bet on it being a bit of an acquired taste though.
Cold Hell I think on the other hand is an awesome film that I can quite safely envision a good chunk of people here enjoying.
The latest masterpiece of iconic director Tommy Wiseau called "Big Shark" coming soon. Steven Spielberg is gonna be jealous
the lead Zahra turned out to be a muslima in disguise indeed and they could have worked that much better to at least send a good powerful message. I guess their goal was more for it to be kind of a documentary. Btw last month in the exact same cinema as where I was apparently 4 people got arrested for showing 'suspicious' behaviour while the movie was playing, so it was weird to read that afterwards. Somehow it doesn't surprise me, the movie gave me all kinds of negative feels/made me uneasy as well and in front of such a big screen I can see how it can be triggering in many ways. I don't really recommend to watch this movie either, its not fun to watch at all and gives negative messages imo. Still I'm curious if anyone else here has watched it?
I guess I'll watch Pokemon next xD
