I‘m finally calm! That was phenomenal. These were the best semi-final results I can remember. Genius. Awesome. Heavenly!
I want to mention the stage and the post cards. It’s all very well put together. The place itself is quite infernal but on the other hand they had all the time in the world to set up the stage, to work with sound, to adjust cam angles with no hurry. I guess they were too relaxed since they forgot to clean up the territory around the venue and to brush the hosts up. By the way, they’re quire unremarkable. But they’re not bad either, they just do their job without being annoying, thanks for that. Too bad Anke didn’t bite them.
Postcards are so nice, I liked each of them, especially Montenegrin, Sergej is a funny guy! I’ll check them once again later. Oh and the Belgium one was amazing. Ha-ha-ha.
The stage. Oh God. Oh Fucking Holy Cheesecake. This is cooler than all the eggs Gordon Ramsey has ever cooked, this is cooler than Rambo Amadeus’ swimming pool. The floor is not just phenomenal, it’s pure perfect for a contest like this, it’s the best you can think of. It’s an amazing frame for any number which can help a country get to the final. Except for Belgium. BAZZZINGA.
Ok, let’s take it step by step.
Armenia.
Guys, this does not smell like a winner, not from any distance. I have nothing to say to Aram, but I got a lot to say to people responsible for camera angles and staging. Where’s this camera shaking effect they promised us? Where’s the game of lights? Why is it so bright all the way through? Darkness is just necessary in the slow part of the song, it has to slowly grow as the song grows blowing us all out of the water with light explosion in the dub step part. Idiots, they missed the chance to create the most dramatic and effective staging of 2014, the song itself is begging for it.
The song wasn’t a winning song to begin with, now it’s failure is carved in stone.
Aram is a great guy, but when I look at his face I am expecting him to smile and wink at me with his left foot. This face wasn’t made to sing sad songs, it’s a comedian’s face. But I wish him luck and hope he takes Top-15 position.
Now we’re moving to Latvia.
The backdrop is awesome, I could feel this morning park freshness. Everything is so sweet, but that’s it. It could have sailed into the final should there be more charming artists, but they’re like my rubber plant named Pasha – growing slowly.
P.S: THAT’S FOR OLGA & LIGO.
Heading to Estonia.
Here we can see one more proof that stamps and clones are of no value and thankfully people understand it. Power to the people. The beginning is impressive, it looks beautiful. But the whole thing is so soulless, calculated and thought through that it doesn’t make you feel absolutely anything. It’s like an enema you’re getting while you’re in coma. It does nothing for you.
Oh and…THAT’S FOR SANDRA!
I’m flying to Sweden!
Sanna did an amazing job, she’s vocally perfect as usual. Lights added some emotion to staging where nothing is going on. No surprise, it’s stable and unbreakable like corruption.
From cold Sweden to colder Iceland!
God, it’s hot in here. Eye-ripping colors, energy, a whole bag of fun. Great job, it deserved to go through. It’s too bad that Iceland will be dusting up the right side of a score board as usual. But it’s ok for this song, they just needed to get to the finals. Congratulations, folks!
We’re moving to Albania.
It’s so sweet and cute, but totally chanceless. Unfortunately, that’s not one of these songs you can appreciate right from the very first second, it’s a complex dish and there are not too many gourmands among viewers. The dress was really bad for Hersi, she should never wear fabric like this, it makes her look bigger. Plus, it was badly shot. It would be nice to see some interaction between Hersi and the guitar guy but the question is would she be able to sing her song as purely? It doesn’t matter. The song is too complicated for a first time listener and there was nothing visually catchy. It’s a shame.
Aaaand I don’t have to run to Russia, I’m already here.
Wow. I so did not expect such an emotional breakthrough from these two hamsters, but they turned out to be tigers. Great job, adrenaline finally kicked them up their asses and they could send a powerful ball of energy our ways. Bravo. Staging was great as well but I still think they should have covered this swing metal frame so it looked like a round sun when put together. It’d be even more effective. Awesomey awesome. But the song still sucks, sorry.
I’m running to sunny Azerbaijan!
Dilara was so tender and moving. She was shaking a bit but it suited this fragile emotional song really well. I’m not happy about this gymnast, that’s not the best azeri staging ever but whatever. So…some pee their pants saying that Axel has the best vocals in the competition.
Guys. There are a lot of artists in this world, they know shadow/highlights/perspective/colors, they can draw technically correct things. But you just look at them and forget about them in few seconds. And there’s Picasso. With his dirty, torn, filthy, sharp, academically incorrect paintings that **** on all the rules and perspective. You don’t like them. But you look at them for hours thinking – why is it so popular and expensive? What do people find in it? So I think you understand who’s Picasso in this case.
You can be a technically good singer, but if you don’t have anything special in your voice there’s nothing that can possibly help you. You better go learn how to cook or you’re going to spend the rest of your life as a backing vocalist. Forever and ever.
Nature was very generous with Dilara. Her technically “incorrect” vocals fly me to the moon. That’s what talent is about. That’s what makes a great chef special comparing to just a guy who knows bunch of recipes and who can mix ingredients. You gotta bring something new to the table. Dilara does.
We’re jumping towards Ukraine!...oh wait, I’ll just stare from the outside.
But I’d look way closer when it comes to Maria. Despite the fact I hate what they did with the song, the staging is heavenly. It’s so well done, so interesting and unique than you cannot take your eyes off it. Maria is heavenly. The dress is heavenly. The dude is heavenly. The wheel is heavenly. Somebody stop me. The backdrop is heavenly. The light is heavenly. Will somebody stop me?? I can go on all night! Camera angles are heavenly. The hair is heavenly. The make up is heavenly. The vocals a…oh whew, finally. Vocals are just great, perfect for this song. There’s nothing else to add there. I suppose, Ukraine can easily be the first semi- final winner by a good margin. Standing, laying, sitting, all the Kamasutra positions ovation. FUCKING BRAVO.
Belgium. I don’t even wanna go there, I’ll shout it out their way from afar. SUCK IT. Carlson didn’t make it and thank god even Freken Bok couldn’t help him. This is spectacular. I see no reason why I should talk about this garbage any longer. Moving on!
Hellloo to sunny Moldova! Oh wait….it’s quite dark and so not cozy in here. Yes? Or no? It’s weird, the whole staging is sooo off base with the song. Light dress, light dancers’ costumes, too much lighting. All this light with this dark song? What an idiothole came up with that. Everything is bad bad bad. Starting with the singer herself that I’m sure is a great warm person, but she would look way better in a kitchen making soup or in a market selling tomatoes. She ain’t got no bitchiness and darkness to sing a song like this. I’d track her stylist down, rip off his face, chop off his fingers, break his legs in 15 places, absorb his nose with acid and burry him alive. I’d do the same with the one who came up with this brilliant hair idea. But i'd add some concrete to his coffin.
The dancers are great though. Why the hell is Pasha Parfeni producing that, it’s a mystery to me. I guess good friendship and hangover are the ones to blame. It’s a totally unpromising artist.
Now I’m running away from this horror, moving on to San Marino.
Oh God, Valentina was so airy, tender, sweet, she was shining from the inside. There were no limb convulsions she loves demonstrating sometimes. She was a little bit nervous but that’s it. What a wonderful floor animation, the fog, the angles, what an amazing dress. What a wonderful gal what a wonderful shell. I don’t like the song but Valentina deserved it hands down. Honestly, from my heart, congrats! Never give up.
Work your hips, folks, keep moving keep moving aaaaand with this dance we pass Portugal heading straight to the Netherlands. No we’re not coming back, it’s all bad in there.
Wow, the staging was so cool, the singers were relaxed, beautiful, confident. Asphalt and a moving lane on the floor were great. Perfect camera work. Honestly, I thought they wouldn’t make it cause the song is too calm and it’s hard to understand from the very first listen, but I am happy to be wrong. I wish them a great place in the finals. They deserved it second year in a row.
I’m flying to Montenegro on the wings of luv.
Sergej was more charming than I expected, he sang it perfectly. It’s a beautiful staging, but I’d fucking kill the skater girl, she was weak. But whatever. It was so beautiful.
Interesting thing, there are so many ballads in this semi but they’re all so different. Armenia is modern and technical, Sweden is academically correct and powerful, Albania is unusual and complex, Azerbaijan is touching, Belgium is depressing and standard, San Marino is tender, Montenegro is pure beautiful. Guess what? Light defeated darkness in this semi. It screwed darkness over. So it knows better.
Now we stop in Hungary for some rest.
Everything is right, the staging is right, the vocals are right, the backdrop is right. But Andras is creepy. Right, I said it. Ok ok, no more.
So, it’s all right. It’s so right that it’s boring. That’s not a winner.
I’m not lying, me and my friend went to the balcony during a commercial break, looked at the sky and I said “God, I don’t believe in you and I have never asked you for anything, but please make it so Belgium doesn’t go through!”, and later I said “The Netherlands are going through I think…Now imagine both Montenegro and San Marino making it. That’d be epic!”
What do you know? I’ll go to church tomorrow
Those are the best results I could have dreamed of. This is the best Eurovision so far, imo. I am so satisfied, completely. I guess someone up there heard my prayers. I think it was a seagull. Or some space junk. Whatever. I’ll pray for them too )
I want to mention the stage and the post cards. It’s all very well put together. The place itself is quite infernal but on the other hand they had all the time in the world to set up the stage, to work with sound, to adjust cam angles with no hurry. I guess they were too relaxed since they forgot to clean up the territory around the venue and to brush the hosts up. By the way, they’re quire unremarkable. But they’re not bad either, they just do their job without being annoying, thanks for that. Too bad Anke didn’t bite them.
Postcards are so nice, I liked each of them, especially Montenegrin, Sergej is a funny guy! I’ll check them once again later. Oh and the Belgium one was amazing. Ha-ha-ha.
The stage. Oh God. Oh Fucking Holy Cheesecake. This is cooler than all the eggs Gordon Ramsey has ever cooked, this is cooler than Rambo Amadeus’ swimming pool. The floor is not just phenomenal, it’s pure perfect for a contest like this, it’s the best you can think of. It’s an amazing frame for any number which can help a country get to the final. Except for Belgium. BAZZZINGA.
Ok, let’s take it step by step.
Armenia.
Guys, this does not smell like a winner, not from any distance. I have nothing to say to Aram, but I got a lot to say to people responsible for camera angles and staging. Where’s this camera shaking effect they promised us? Where’s the game of lights? Why is it so bright all the way through? Darkness is just necessary in the slow part of the song, it has to slowly grow as the song grows blowing us all out of the water with light explosion in the dub step part. Idiots, they missed the chance to create the most dramatic and effective staging of 2014, the song itself is begging for it.
The song wasn’t a winning song to begin with, now it’s failure is carved in stone.
Aram is a great guy, but when I look at his face I am expecting him to smile and wink at me with his left foot. This face wasn’t made to sing sad songs, it’s a comedian’s face. But I wish him luck and hope he takes Top-15 position.
Now we’re moving to Latvia.
The backdrop is awesome, I could feel this morning park freshness. Everything is so sweet, but that’s it. It could have sailed into the final should there be more charming artists, but they’re like my rubber plant named Pasha – growing slowly.
P.S: THAT’S FOR OLGA & LIGO.
Heading to Estonia.
Here we can see one more proof that stamps and clones are of no value and thankfully people understand it. Power to the people. The beginning is impressive, it looks beautiful. But the whole thing is so soulless, calculated and thought through that it doesn’t make you feel absolutely anything. It’s like an enema you’re getting while you’re in coma. It does nothing for you.
Oh and…THAT’S FOR SANDRA!
I’m flying to Sweden!
Sanna did an amazing job, she’s vocally perfect as usual. Lights added some emotion to staging where nothing is going on. No surprise, it’s stable and unbreakable like corruption.
From cold Sweden to colder Iceland!
God, it’s hot in here. Eye-ripping colors, energy, a whole bag of fun. Great job, it deserved to go through. It’s too bad that Iceland will be dusting up the right side of a score board as usual. But it’s ok for this song, they just needed to get to the finals. Congratulations, folks!
We’re moving to Albania.
It’s so sweet and cute, but totally chanceless. Unfortunately, that’s not one of these songs you can appreciate right from the very first second, it’s a complex dish and there are not too many gourmands among viewers. The dress was really bad for Hersi, she should never wear fabric like this, it makes her look bigger. Plus, it was badly shot. It would be nice to see some interaction between Hersi and the guitar guy but the question is would she be able to sing her song as purely? It doesn’t matter. The song is too complicated for a first time listener and there was nothing visually catchy. It’s a shame.
Aaaand I don’t have to run to Russia, I’m already here.
Wow. I so did not expect such an emotional breakthrough from these two hamsters, but they turned out to be tigers. Great job, adrenaline finally kicked them up their asses and they could send a powerful ball of energy our ways. Bravo. Staging was great as well but I still think they should have covered this swing metal frame so it looked like a round sun when put together. It’d be even more effective. Awesomey awesome. But the song still sucks, sorry.
I’m running to sunny Azerbaijan!
Dilara was so tender and moving. She was shaking a bit but it suited this fragile emotional song really well. I’m not happy about this gymnast, that’s not the best azeri staging ever but whatever. So…some pee their pants saying that Axel has the best vocals in the competition.
Guys. There are a lot of artists in this world, they know shadow/highlights/perspective/colors, they can draw technically correct things. But you just look at them and forget about them in few seconds. And there’s Picasso. With his dirty, torn, filthy, sharp, academically incorrect paintings that **** on all the rules and perspective. You don’t like them. But you look at them for hours thinking – why is it so popular and expensive? What do people find in it? So I think you understand who’s Picasso in this case.
You can be a technically good singer, but if you don’t have anything special in your voice there’s nothing that can possibly help you. You better go learn how to cook or you’re going to spend the rest of your life as a backing vocalist. Forever and ever.
Nature was very generous with Dilara. Her technically “incorrect” vocals fly me to the moon. That’s what talent is about. That’s what makes a great chef special comparing to just a guy who knows bunch of recipes and who can mix ingredients. You gotta bring something new to the table. Dilara does.
We’re jumping towards Ukraine!...oh wait, I’ll just stare from the outside.
But I’d look way closer when it comes to Maria. Despite the fact I hate what they did with the song, the staging is heavenly. It’s so well done, so interesting and unique than you cannot take your eyes off it. Maria is heavenly. The dress is heavenly. The dude is heavenly. The wheel is heavenly. Somebody stop me. The backdrop is heavenly. The light is heavenly. Will somebody stop me?? I can go on all night! Camera angles are heavenly. The hair is heavenly. The make up is heavenly. The vocals a…oh whew, finally. Vocals are just great, perfect for this song. There’s nothing else to add there. I suppose, Ukraine can easily be the first semi- final winner by a good margin. Standing, laying, sitting, all the Kamasutra positions ovation. FUCKING BRAVO.
Belgium. I don’t even wanna go there, I’ll shout it out their way from afar. SUCK IT. Carlson didn’t make it and thank god even Freken Bok couldn’t help him. This is spectacular. I see no reason why I should talk about this garbage any longer. Moving on!
Hellloo to sunny Moldova! Oh wait….it’s quite dark and so not cozy in here. Yes? Or no? It’s weird, the whole staging is sooo off base with the song. Light dress, light dancers’ costumes, too much lighting. All this light with this dark song? What an idiothole came up with that. Everything is bad bad bad. Starting with the singer herself that I’m sure is a great warm person, but she would look way better in a kitchen making soup or in a market selling tomatoes. She ain’t got no bitchiness and darkness to sing a song like this. I’d track her stylist down, rip off his face, chop off his fingers, break his legs in 15 places, absorb his nose with acid and burry him alive. I’d do the same with the one who came up with this brilliant hair idea. But i'd add some concrete to his coffin.
The dancers are great though. Why the hell is Pasha Parfeni producing that, it’s a mystery to me. I guess good friendship and hangover are the ones to blame. It’s a totally unpromising artist.
Now I’m running away from this horror, moving on to San Marino.
Oh God, Valentina was so airy, tender, sweet, she was shining from the inside. There were no limb convulsions she loves demonstrating sometimes. She was a little bit nervous but that’s it. What a wonderful floor animation, the fog, the angles, what an amazing dress. What a wonderful gal what a wonderful shell. I don’t like the song but Valentina deserved it hands down. Honestly, from my heart, congrats! Never give up.
Work your hips, folks, keep moving keep moving aaaaand with this dance we pass Portugal heading straight to the Netherlands. No we’re not coming back, it’s all bad in there.
Wow, the staging was so cool, the singers were relaxed, beautiful, confident. Asphalt and a moving lane on the floor were great. Perfect camera work. Honestly, I thought they wouldn’t make it cause the song is too calm and it’s hard to understand from the very first listen, but I am happy to be wrong. I wish them a great place in the finals. They deserved it second year in a row.
I’m flying to Montenegro on the wings of luv.
Sergej was more charming than I expected, he sang it perfectly. It’s a beautiful staging, but I’d fucking kill the skater girl, she was weak. But whatever. It was so beautiful.
Interesting thing, there are so many ballads in this semi but they’re all so different. Armenia is modern and technical, Sweden is academically correct and powerful, Albania is unusual and complex, Azerbaijan is touching, Belgium is depressing and standard, San Marino is tender, Montenegro is pure beautiful. Guess what? Light defeated darkness in this semi. It screwed darkness over. So it knows better.
Now we stop in Hungary for some rest.
Everything is right, the staging is right, the vocals are right, the backdrop is right. But Andras is creepy. Right, I said it. Ok ok, no more.
So, it’s all right. It’s so right that it’s boring. That’s not a winner.
I’m not lying, me and my friend went to the balcony during a commercial break, looked at the sky and I said “God, I don’t believe in you and I have never asked you for anything, but please make it so Belgium doesn’t go through!”, and later I said “The Netherlands are going through I think…Now imagine both Montenegro and San Marino making it. That’d be epic!”
What do you know? I’ll go to church tomorrow
Those are the best results I could have dreamed of. This is the best Eurovision so far, imo. I am so satisfied, completely. I guess someone up there heard my prayers. I think it was a seagull. Or some space junk. Whatever. I’ll pray for them too )
xsorry
