A slightly different approach to our prequalified entry this edition. A wise person (I can't quite remember who) said that when you have a PQ to share a song that would leave you devastated if it were to be left behind in a WorldVision semi, and so here we are. After five long years I bring you the return of this lady whose painfully small discography is nestled in the deepest part of my heart. I've wanted to share her again for so long but the thought made my tummy hurt, and after what almost happened to Andrew last edition, probably with good reason.
Here's
Judee Sill, a Texas born "country-cult-baroque" artist who despite being the first artist signed to the rather iconic Asylum Records (known for musicians such as Joni Mitchell, Tom Waits, Linda Ronstadt), received none of the success she deserved in her short lifetime. This year a film is being released about her life, Soldier of the Heart: The Judee Sill Story. Something I never could have dreamed about years back when her songs that were uploaded to Youtube would have a couple of thousand views each. Nobody knew who she was. She's still unknown but geez, what a story there is to be told here. A really sad one but touching in the way that this troubled soul found solace in music, and I feel that given the chance, this lady's music could touch a lot of people.
Judee endured an abusive upbringing which led to a rebellious phase where she was holding up stores at gunpoint (we're already in deep). She eventually found herself in reform school for forging checks. During this time she kicked her heroin habit and honed her piano skills, picking up some gospel licks she would later use in her songs. When she was free, Judee decided she wanted to become a musician. In 1971, she released her self-titled debut: a majestic psych-folk record full of complex, genre bending beauties, all drowning in generous dollops of reverb and overdubbed multiple times with Judee's soft, almost peculiar vocals that would sing of redemption, angels made of crayon and the astral plane. Despite some strong examples of folk, twangy country and gospel, all tied together with Judee's pop sensibilities, for me it's always been her classical side that was at the forefront. The Bach inspiration was strong on the majority of the pieces she composed. The first Judee Sill song I heard (if my memory hasn't failed me here) was
Lady-O (what I'm sharing with you this edition of WorldVision), a charming, melodically complex little thing that Sill was payed to write for The Turtles before snatching it back for her own debut. So lush. So celestial. I had heard nothing like it before and was fixated immediately. I remember ordering her CDs along with a snazzy pair of Audio Technica AD700 headphones, so I could become the world's worst audiophile. That reverb and how it hits you as she enters that first chorus.... oh man *chef's kiss*.
Despite positive reviews, Judee's debut was a commercial failure. In a time when being openly bisexual was more than a bold move, she was swimming against the tide (unsure even if
Christian bisexual former bandit hippie would be a good seller today). Regardless, Judee released her second album, Heart Food, in 1973. On this record was a song called The Kiss. If you haven't heard The Kiss, listen to
The Kiss (do it for ol' me). In my world it's the most beautiful piece of music ever written and I struggle to describe how it makes me feel. It's the Judee song I shared with people in this community five years ago, and it still sticks with me strongly as my favourite moment I've been gifted from playing this game. The Kiss came 3rd that edition but it was like as if I'd won, seeing the reactions of those hearing Judee's music for the first time. It's why it's taken me so long to share her with you again, as I knew I'd be unable to ever match what that song brought some of the people here.
Heart Food was sadly another commercial failure for Judee and she was dropped from the Asylum Records label. In the next few years followed several family tragedies, multiple car crashes, failed back surgery that left Judee in crippling pain, along with a return to drug addiction. Judee was working on a third album but due to the lack of interest in her music, it was left unfinished, although later released as Dreams Come True in 2005. She was so eager to make music though that at one point her friends were carrying her into the recording studios when she couldn't walk. She was understandably frustrated by her lack of success, at shows begging fans to "please buy my records so that I don't have to open for these snotty rock bands anymore." In her lifetime she was the underdog, and yet stand her music side by side her peers and it's baffling why she was only one of two artists from Asylum Records to not make it big.
In 1979 Judee died from a drug overdose. It was ruled as suicide but those that knew her were convinced she had a will to live and was on her way to recovery. Judee didn't receive an obituary, such was her obscurity by that time. On the one hand I don't like putting emphasis on Judee's deeply tragic life, almost as if it were the main event. At the same time though, to know her story adds to the fascination and wonder of the music she made. It wasn't a delicate, easy ride at all which was a stark contrast to the celestial melodies she'd write. When Judee performed you could sense her pain was easing up somehow. The hurt and depression might have been back again the moment she stopped, but the few live performances from her that exist are other-worldly. I love the term "achingly beautiful" but I feel it's not enough to describe some of the songs Judee composed. I'd call them excruciatingly beautiful, at least in the case of The Kiss as I'm literally a wreck whenever I listen to it. I wish Judee had given us more but I treasure the two studio albums she released. I can't wait for the movie about her life (unsure if my little heart will be ready for it), and I hope that this will be Judee's year.
While you sit and seek
A crescent moon is layin’ at your feet
With hope that’s made of sand
You don’t think you can
But you would held it all in your hand
Lady-O
I’ve been tryin’ hard to keep from needin’ you
But from the start
My heart just rolled and flowed
I’ve seen where it goes
And still somehow my love for you grows
Lady-O
So on my heels I’ll grow wings
Gonna ride silver strings
But I’ll see you in my holiest dreams
Lady-O
So on my heels I’ll grow wings
Gonna ride silver strings
But I’ll see you in my holiest dreams
Lady-O