Warning; Contains Opinions. please try to not be offended.
With the 2024 season well underway, time has now come to slice into another group of Eurovision hopefuls. Eesti Laul has a new head of delegation and new format, and we definitely do not want to miss out on providing our usual mix of constructive criticism and cathartic rants. Did the new HoD deliver more on her first run than Tomi Rahula did, or is Estonia back to square one?
Thus, one hundred and twenty write-ups by six our editors, each with differing views, morals and weights. Who is going to emerge as our favourite and which are out five qualifiers for the upcoming semifinal on Saturday? Let’s race!
On Estonia’s review panel we find:
- Representing Angry Logic, it’s Boris Meersman!
- Representing Clueless Heterosexuals, it’s David Popescu!
- Representing Socially Drunk Guncles, it’s James Maude!
- Representing Unrelentless Positivity, it’s Jasmin Prišć!
- Representing the Five Stages of Grief, it’s Tyler Griffith!
- Representing Unassuming Young Fans, it’s Yehonatan Cohen!
Today we will be reviewing these five hopefuls:
Each ranker has provided a score between 0 and 10 to the twenty hopefuls, without knowledge of what the others have written and scored. All information we currently know (studio cuts, interviews, live performances outside of EL) can be taken into account for reviews, but be aware that opinions may change or age poorly based on what happens during the Semifinal and Grand Final.
But before we begin, the usual disclaimer so we don’t get blacklisted:
Opinons stated below only reflect the views of the editor, and not of ESCUnited as a whole, nor those of our benevolent overlord Matt. You may direct your grievances at the editor responsible for vertical classification. Each reviewer is also aware that their opinions will be made public so if you’re one of these five reviewed artists and you meet the editor that eviscerated you, feel free to trash them back. They knew the risks. ^_^
And let’s delve into our first batch of five, in order of appearance, and we begin with a very big name indeed:
Boris – 9 – “These friendly fellows regale the tale of an acid trip gone disastrously awry, but swear they don’t know absolutely nothing about no drugs, sir (“I DON’T KNOW NARCOTICS, ONLY LEMONADE AND CIDER, I COULDN’T TELL THE DIFFERENCE BETWEEN VITAMINS AND AMPHETAMINE” I- 😭😭😭) . As you may expect, folk punk shenanigans ensue and it’s f’ckin’ uproarious. The combination of 5Miinuust’s smarmy nasal vocals and Puuluup’s screechy talharpa turns :inhales: nendestnarkarkootikumidesteiteameküllmidagi into a Trenuletul on (metaphorical?) crack, and it goes hard from second one without slowing down. Estonia could not have picked a better opener for their selection. ”
David – 2 – ” It feels so obvious, what the song is trying to achieve. It’s loud, crazy and no doubt attention seeking. I’ll even admit, this is what I do kind of enjoy, but somehow, it still fails for me. As if, it tries so hard, that it’s not even enjoyable. Sure, I’d probably vibe to this the first minute, but then it gets really boring fast. This on repeat over and over… no way in my life”
James – 7 – “Eurovision national selection season is usually scattered with the corpses of songs that get humor, messaging, fun, and the combination thereof completely wrong. Here, the humor is not forced, too camp, or aimed at imbeciles. There is a message (drugs are bad, kids), but it doesn’t hammer you over the head with it or get too preachy. There is a fun factor, but not forced in the bunch of dads pissing about at TGI Fridays kind of way we normally expect. This is a Goldilocks folk-tinged party anthem – it’s just right, and around these guys, you don’t have to worry about your bowl of porridge being spiked.”
Jasmin – 8.5 – ” A unique entry one would expect from Moldova but hardly from Estonia. I enjoy in the chorus, especially the vocalist that sounds as if he is using the throat singing technique. This is definitely an original entry that will make people dance but it is also interesting as it changes frequently. I hope they will come up with great staging for this as it is one of my favorites at the moment. Great job! ”
Tyler – 7 – “I have no idea what I just listened to, but it already feels so positive and upbeat that I enjoy it anyway! I’m envisioning that the staging is going to be chaotic based on the sounds and the music video, but this should still be entertaining otherwise. I can see this being a televote qualifier, but not sure how the jury will feel about this.”
Yehonatan – 8 – “This feels like something Moldova would send to Eurovision, and I mean it in every possible good way. It’s authentic and unapologetic fun, that doesn’t take it self too seriously. The folky elements add a lot of character ot the song, in a rather lifeless nation final season (although Eesti Laul in general is probably my favorite National Final thus far.”
Statistics
Total Score: 41.5/60
Highest Rating: 9 (Boris)
Lowest Rating: 2 (David)
Lowest non-David rating: 7 (Tyler, James)
Amount of 1s given by David: 0
Final Mark: A (69%)
Listen to “(nendest) narkootikumidest ei tea me (küll) midagi” below:
Agree with our editors? Let us know in the comments how #YOU would rate this entry.
Boris – 6.5 – “Good on you, Inga! I am pleased that you’re standing up for yourself after that tampon advert of a song you entered with last time. Personal growth! The best part of “No dog on a leash” are its lyrics and that’s always dicey: Melody > Message, always, and while the canine-tinged slam poetry leaves me slobbering and salivating for more, the melody itself is just kinda vibin’ in the bg. I do enjoy it as a trippy electropop piece (it really is more A Piece than A Song, isn’t it? ❤), but I require a killer live to be fully brought on board for an entry like this. Inga has proven to have the chomps (Milline Päev ❤) but even with a strong performance reaching the finale will take Sisyphean effort.”
David – 1 – “What are these lyrics… alright, looking into the music first, we have a rather interesting beat, that could go somewhere interesting, which eventually gets lost. An underground style, which gets more and more like a dance track, really doesn’t go that well here. Anyway, lyrically… just a complete disaster.”
James – 7 – “First the positives: A+ for all the canine references without having to resort to the obvious begins with a b and rhymes with itch word! Inga runs with the dog metaphor and pounds out some good lyrics as a result. Apart from the muse reference, which is a little ropey and doesn’t fit with the overall theme, though you do ultimately get what she means. One negative is that the chorus falls a little flat. For the song’s title, you want a bit more bite to the chorus. The panting added into the background is a neat touch, but the track needs some more bark to add to the aggression and defiance Inga wants to sell.”
Jasmin – 7 – “The electropop production sounds fresh and current. I am not the biggest fan of the lyrics because of how literal they are in some places. The stylistic choice behind Inga’s vocal interpretation doesn’t resonate too much with me but I see it fitting for moody song of this type. It gives massive potential for amazing live performance ”
Tyler – 6.5 – “I quite like Inga’s vocals here! I like the vibe of the song and if the staging isn’t on-the-nose, I think this could work live and escape the semi-final as well. “No Dog On a Leash” is a good mix of R&B and trap and I’m excited to see if Inga can impress live. I’m not crazy in love with this entry though as I need to see a proof of concept to really back this as my Estonian favorite.”
Yehonatan – 3.5 – “‘No Dog On a Leash’ creates a techno atmosphere that feels like a fever dream. Unfortunatly it doesn’t stand out melodically enough to justify it. It feels like it ends before it really managed to develop into something cool like the beginning suggested.”
Statistics
Total Score: 31.5/60
Highest Rating: 7 (James, Jasmin)
Lowest Rating: 1 (David)
Lowest non-David rating: 3.5 (Yehonatan)
Amount of 1s given by David: 1
Final Mark: C (53%)
Listen to “No dog on a leash” below:
Agree with our editors? Let us know in the comments how #YOU would rate this entry.
Boris – 4 – “I am ASLEEP, Ollie. I wasn’t too hot on Venom before (#proudBedwettersfan) but it was catchy and had live potential. I’m stone cold on attempt #2, whatever it’s called. The same formula, the same imitation Green Day vibe, the same ~edgy emo boy~ smarm, but musically even more watch the paint-by-numbers dry than before. Why is it called (*peruses notes*) My Friend, when the hook (that I’ve already forgotten about, five minutes after last hearing it) is something different?! I pray Estonia see the light and find their way a good song to stan. This lazy piece of derivative really ought not to be seen as a serious attempt.”
David – 7 – “Last year’s runner-up trying his craft once again, and let’s be honest, he knows his own craft. Raw and raspy voice, to some harsh pop-rock tunes. Easily a winner combo going on here, where I’m struggling the most, is definitely the lyrics, since there’s nothing catchy to remember. Not exactly your typical sing-a-long hymn, and it damages the song a lot. Otherwise, it could’ve been the whole package.”
James – 9 – “Did you ever think Sjonni’s Friends’ “Coming Home” (particularly the sentiment contained therein) needed to be retooled as an alternative rock anthem? If so, then Ollie’s “My Friend” is for you. The lyrics in the chorus and the guitars coming in are perfectly matched – you really feel the angst of Ollie struggling to say what he wanted to say to his friend, and that gut-wrenching emotion of being unable to do so because that friend has gone. And the guitars at the bridge feel like a punch to the wall. Life is short, kids. Reach out to those with whom you have unfinished business or friends and families worth reconnecting with. Ollie sells the pain of not doing so when you had the chance.”
Jasmin – 8.5 – “A slightly misleading piano start until the song develops into a proper rock ballad. Ollie’s raspy vocal ticks all the boxes with its unique roughness that doesn’t sound forced to me. I can relate to the lyrics of this song a lot. The only thing that doesn’t make it a standout winner for me is that it lacks a bit of ingenuity.”
Tyler – 4 – “I wasn’t a fan of Ollie’s previous entry “Venom” and I’m happy to say that hasn’t changed with this song! As annoyed as I am with artists playing the piano, the discordance with the sound of Ollie’s voice to the melodic piano notes was interesting. But then that all changed into screaming that I struggle to have nice things to say about. Ollie has his fans and I’m sure this entry will do well regardless of my thoughts about it.”
Yehonatan – 9 – “Finally a serious rock entry in this season that isn’t dull! Great instrumentals, true rock vocals, and an epic break. ‘My Friend’ in my opinion does all of those even better than Ollie’s previous song ‘Venom’, and I’m hoping he can finally take the crown after last year. Needless to say, he has really strong competition from a few directions, so it will be interesting to see how this plays out”
Statistics
Total Score: 41.5/60
Highest Rating: 9 (James, Yehonatan)
Lowest Rating: 4 (Boris, Tyler)
Amount of 1s given by David: 1
Final Mark: A (66%)
Listen to “My friend” below:
Agree with our editors? Let us know in the comments how #YOU would rate this entry.
Boris – 6 – “Yonna’s song is cute and quirky semi filler. But it is filler nevertheless.”
David – 1 – “- This is quite a mess, it felt like the song wanted to shift multiple times throughout the 3 minutes it lasts. From a slow ballad, to slightly more tempo, to something in the middle, to I don’t even know. It somehow is like that both musically and lyrically, as in completely without any structure. I’m just completely lost.”
James – 5 – “A slightly tedious break-up song with generic lyrics sang with all the enthusiasm of going to the Post Office. I hope she lives up to her promise of never writing another song about the unnamed ex. It’s more of a mood piece and lacks a great hook. And it’s not really a mood I want at Eurovision.”
Jasmin – 6.5 – “This immediatelly gives Amanda Tenfjord vibes because of the way it starts. I enjoy in Yonna’s light vocal, so I dislike the effects they put on the vocal. I dislike how the production changed to electro at the end. Overall not bad but not my fave.”
Tyler – 5.5 – “This song was fine! I can see myself listening to “I Don’t Know About You” in the car, but the song doesn’t make me want to stop and take it in if that makes sense. Easy background music, but nothing extraordinary to it. I think Yonna has potential with a catchier song, so I’ll be excited to see her in Eesti Laul next year if she tries again!”
Yehonatan – 6.5 – “What if Taylor Swift was Estonian and decided to send a ‘Midnights’ song to Eesti Laul is not a question I ever though I’ll be asking but now we know the answer. The result is a cute ballad that is not very competitive but has its charm that sets it apart from other ballads in this selection. The Taylor Swift ballad didn’t work for Mia Dimšić and so this will be risky in Eurovision, but I don’t think it has any chances of being selected to begin with so we don’t need to worry about that.”
Statistics
Total Score: 30.5/60
Highest Rating: 6.5 (Jasmin, Yehonatan)
Lowest Rating: 1 (David)
Lowest non-David rating: 5 (James)
Amount of 1s given by David: 2
Final Mark: C- (51%)
Listen to “I don’t know about you” below:
Agree with our editors? Let us know in the comments how #YOU would rate this entry.
Boris – 6 – “I’m easy to please. I hear 80s synthwave, and I’ll chuck it on the Like Pile. That said however, “Korra veel” has a few problems: first and foremost, its melody is not strong compared to other Estonian synthpop songs. Traffic’s for instance, is much better. Korra Veel is no Spirit Animal, no Missing Light, no Golden Shores, no Lost in a Dance, etc. Secondly, Estonian Synthpop songs are usually live disasters (see again: all aforementioned) and Peter tries to force a few screamnotes which: best of luck. Finally, and perhaps I’m reading too much into the music video, but the ensemble feels a bit formulaic, maybe a even a bit… AI-like? (god why does EVERY country have at least one song like that in its selection? LOVE YOURSELVES) You have a pretty sick beat, and then kind of… do nothing creative with it. I’m still giving a 6 though, because again, I’m a sucker for tracks such as these, even the royalty-free offerings, but I’m left with the feeling that Korra Veel could have been much more than what it currently is.”
David – 6 – “Futuristic electronic in Estonian, honestly not bad. The song does feel a bit limited, as in, it feels like it was to go further and have a greater impact, but it just can’t reach that point, because it’s only 3 minutes. There’s a lack of depth, which the song could’ve really benefited from, so beat never really develops and ends of feeling slow, when it needs more energy.”
James – 6 – “Fairly chill as a synthwave-tinged pop track goes. It succeeds as a vibe, but lacks a memorable hook that you’d need at Eurovision. Plus, isn’t it a little late to be trying this subgenre right now? This type of retro song – modern production trying to retcon as a soundtrack to ‘80s sci-fi – is itself now retro.”
Jasmin – 6 – “This song at the beginning reminded me of futuristic space movies and I expected it will go in a direction of being epic and grandeous. Instead, it took the electro pop route. The instrumental sounds derivative of another song tho and I am not a fan of that. I appreciate the powerful vocal in places and I’d like if that was present throughout the whole song.”
Tyler – 6.5 – “This score is slightly inflated for “Korra veel” mostly because of the synth notes and how 80s the song feels. It sounds quite nice! However, Peter’s vocals to me are hit or miss and it sounds like half of the time just screaming. The song has great potential though, and I want to like it so much more, but the vocals are the big demerit for me in truly stanning this entry.”
Yehonatan – 5 – “Another dark synth pop song with not a lot going on in it. The only positive I find to this song is that it is very well produced and that really says it all. Nothing else about this entry is bad, it’s just not very noteworthy.”
Statistics
Total Score: 35.5/60
Highest Rating: 6.5 (Tyler)
Lowest Rating: 5 (Yehonatan)
Amount of 1s given by David: 2
Final Mark: C+ (59%)
Listen to “Korra Veel” below:
Agree with our editors? Let us know in the comments how #YOU would rate this entry.
And that concludes our reviews for today. But don’t worry, we’ll get back at you with part two VERY soon 🙂
THE RANKING:
Ollie and 5Miinust & Puuluup emerged on top for the first batch, however, since Ollie had more high scores, he’s getting the edge in the ranking here. Peter Põder docks at a middling 59%, while the two ladies have to content themselves with a barely passing grade:
- Ollie – “My friend” (69%, two 9s)
- 5Miinust & Puuluup – “(nendest) narkootikumidest ei tea me (küll) midagi” (69%, one 9)
- Peter Põder – “Korra veel” (59%)
- INGA – “No dog on a leash” (53%)
- Yonna – “I don’t know about you” (51%)
VOTING CHART
Below you can find how our editors voted for the first five songs in EL 2024:
More entries will be added in future posts.
IN OR OUT?
With 15 Semifinalists and only five qualifiers, we’re also keeping tabs on who we think should qualify or and who should not. Right now we’ve reviewed five semifinalists so these are the base qualifiers for now. WILL we like any song more than Yonna or will these be our finalists at the end of Friday? All shall be revealed in time.
Remaining reviews: to be added later:
Part 2
Part 3
Part 4
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