Disclaimer: contains opinions. All opinions stated belong to the quoted person, and do not represent the views of ESCUnited as a whole.
Hello everyone! Rehearsals are fully under way in Madrid for the upcoming 2024 Junior Eurovision Song Contest. We at ESCUnited have reviewed the entrants as JESC comes ever closer. Note that these reviews were collected before rehearsals started. Therefore, rehearsals are not taken into account.
Our senior reviewer Boris leads the charge, and is joined by our returning writers Alexandros and Holly, as well as our new writers Rebecca and Sam. What opinions do our quintet have in store? Well, read around and find out.
As stated, we shall go over all 17 songs in running order, spread over five updates. In Thursday’s update, we will rate and review two-time JESC winners Poland, three-time JESC winners Georgia and hosts Spain.
#08. POLAND
Dominik Arim- “All together”
Languages: Polish & English
Music & Lyrics: Aldona Dąbrowska & Sławomir Sokołowski.
THE REVIEWS:
ALEXANDROS – 3 – “I thoroughly enjoyed the lyrics of this song, but I found the song itself to be less impressive. I believe the melody is quite old-fashioned for him and the genre he represents as a child. However, I did appreciate the visuals in the music video. I liked the simplicity, and the earthy colors used.”
BORIS – 3 – “In a tradition dating back to the Iron Curtain, Eastern European talk shows have had a knack for inviting over talented child singers and force them to sing two minutes of depressing retirement home ballads for their audience of senile, indoctrinated adults. “All Together” reminds me of that, and it’s a bad look. It’s so *OLD* it’s giving Benjamin Button. Remember when Poland dominated JESC with memorable, on-trend, all-inclusive bangers? What the hell happened to that? DO BETTER.”
HOLLY – 5.5 – “Oh, how I love a double key change, and the half-time section before the final chorus is a really nice touch. Dominik has a beautiful voice and conveys the emotion of the song so powerfully, but the backing vocals are incredibly distracting, and actively detract from what is otherwise quite a pleasant listen.”
REBECCA – 4 – “The song itself feels very generic and dated… Didn’t really pique my interest, sadly. Dominik has a lovely voice and his stage presence (in the music video, at least) was certainly the highlight of this entry. I think that his live performance could really elevate this song!”
SAM – 5 – ““All Together” is an early-2000s adult contemporary power ballad foisted upon an unsuspecting 11-year-old boy. Dominik Arim is a very talented singer and does his best to rise to the occasion, gamely trying to sell the song as best he can in his national final performance, but I can’t help but feel sorry for him. Surely no pre-teen, if given this choice, would select this song to perform in a competition with songs that are more fresh, more upbeat and, frankly, more cool. It’s especially unfortunate that Arim has to follow North Macedonia’s “Marathon,” a song brimming with youthful energy.”
STATISTICS
Total score: 20.5/50
Highest mark: 5.5 (Holly)
Lowest mark: 3 (Alexandros, Boris)
Percentage: 41%
________________________________________________________________________
#09. GEORGIA
Andria Putkaradze – “To my mom”
Languages: Georgian
Music & Lyrics: Gaga Kukhianidze & Maka Daviataia.
THE REVIEWS:
ALEXANDROS – 5 – “One of the nicest instrumentals for this year’s JESC but boy oh boy, this is an adult song with kids bop lyrics. It has that 60-70s vibe that doesn’t align with Andria’s style, in my opinion. The lyrics also seem a bit scattered from a storytelling perspective. However, the music video was quite enjoyable and well-suited to the song”
BORIS – 7 – “A chord-for-chord oldtimey Disney Princess ballad ♥ Yeah, if you’re balladeering in JESC, serenading the many creatures of the forest (maybe fewer birds and deer and more wolves and goblins?) is one way to do it. “To my mom” is a little obsequious and cloying, but that’s forgivable – it’s an ode to his mom after all. I prefer the other ballads in this field, however.”
HOLLY – 10 – “Georgian JESC entries often feel transcendent, skipping the trends in favour of making magic that transports you to another world. Between the jazz-inspired instrumental and the conviction and raw honesty in Andria’s voice, I would pay the big bucks to see this as the 11 o’clock number in a Broadway show. Absolutely perfect. No notes.”
REBECCA – 8 – “Sweet and powerful all rolled into one! Andria’s voice and emotions are definitely centre-stage for this performance, and you can see why. You don’t need to understand Georgian to understand how he feels while singing this song. As someone with a very close relationship with my own mother, this one ticked all the right boxes for me.”
SAM – 6.5 – ““To My Mom” is the only song in the 2024 JESC line-up that I could not hum on the spot if asked to. The song is a slow burn that builds nicely and keeps you engaged for its duration, but it’s not especially memorable. It’s objectively a well-composed song, but it’s also plodding. When people dismiss fun pop bangers to argue in favor of “real music,” this is the kind of music they’re talking about – in other words, this has Salvador Sobral’s vote. Andria Putkaradze has a beautiful voice, and the lyrics are touching, but unfortunately, I don’t see this measuring up to some of the other ballads. Worst of all, it comes right before Spain…”
STATISTICS
Total score: 36.5/50
Highest mark: 10 (Holly)
Lowest mark: 5 (Alexandros)
Percentage: 73%
________________________________________________________________________
#10. SPAIN
Chloe DelaRosa- “Como la Lola”
Languages: Spanish
Title in English: “Just Like Lola (Flores)”
Music & Lyrics: Chloe DelaRosa, David Parejo, Luis Ramiro & Alejandro Martínez.
THE REVIEWS:
ALEXANDROS – 4.5 – “I can’t tell if her voice was filtered or her natural one because it’s so cute. Unfortunately, the song doesn’t convey much. It’s one of my dislikes this year, and the lyrics don’t inspire me or even want to listen to it again. I suppose it’s nice for JESC because it’s a rhythmic and upbeat song. I’m sure people will like it but not me.”
BORIS – 8.5 – “Ho boy this is such a throwback to early 2000s JESC. Back in the day, every competing song was like “La Lola”: It is juvenile. It is hyperactive. It is EXTREMELY IRRITATING, lol. Fortunately, as Miriam Margolyes once said to those pathetic self-identifying “slytherins”: It’s *for children*. We as adults can defo be subjected to worse experience than the one “Antes muerta que sencilla, the Hypercore” thrown into the mix. And to a (small) child Spain offers a three minute blissful dance routine , as “COMO LA LO LO LO LO LA” thunders through all of our brains brains for the rest of the evening.”
HOLLY – 8.5 – “Here’s a previously unsaid sentence: Listening to a 9-year-old Spanish girl with a voice like something straight out of a Pixar movie as she raps about Taylor Swift and Shakira is a joy I never knew I needed. Chloe has more coolness in her little finger than I have in my whole body, and she is going to take the world by storm”
REBECCA – 6.5 – “To be quite honest, I was trying very hard not to like this as much as I did. It’s just so catchy and energetic, it was hard not to bop along with it! I’m usually the kind of person that likes my songs to have a bit of meaning and emotion in them—but sometimes that emotion is just plain old fun. Nothing wrong with that!”
SAM – 10 – “Como la Lola” pays homage to pop idols Taylor Swift, Olivia Rodrigo, Shakira, Spain’s own Lola Flores…and perhaps unintentionally, DelaRosa’s spiritual predecessor, another charismatic nine-year-old who won JESC for Spain in 2004. Everything about this entry works: it’s well-written, well-composed and well-produced. It’s youthful and spunky, but confident, rather than baby-ish. I find it genuinely moving when DelaRosa declares: “When I grow up, I want to be a singer.” (I wish I had that level of self-assuredness as an adult.) DelaRosa does face stiff competition from some of the contest’s vocal powerhouses, but in the end, I don’t think it will matter. If she can pull off the live performance, I think this is the one to beat.”
STATISTICS
Total score: 38/50
Highest mark: 10 (Sam)
Lowest mark: 4.5 (Alexandros)
Percentage: 76%
THE SCOREBOARD (10 out of 17 counted)
- ARMENIA (Cosmic Friend) – 83%
- SPAIN (Como La Lola) – 76%
- ALBANIA (Vallëzoj) – 75%
- GEORGIA (To my mom) – 73%
- CYPRUS (Crystal Waters) – 72%
- ESTONIA (Tänavad) – 70%
- ITALY (Pigiama Party) – 60%, Highest 7.5
- NORTH MACEDONIA (Marathon) – 60%, Highest 7
- FRANCE (Comme ci, comme ça) – 58%
- POLAND (All Together) – 41%
ARMENIA retain the lead, as Spain snatch second place from Albania by a sheer 1%. Poland brings up the rear, with the first and so far only score below 50%
What further surprises lie in store for the scoreboard? Check out tomorrow’s update, as we take a deep dive into the entries from Germany, Netherlands, San Marino and Ukraine.
