Team Reviews: Chefsache ESC 2025

Tonight, Germany will select its entry for Eurovision 2025 with the final of its new national selection, Chefsache ESC 2025. Our team has banded together once again to review the lineup before the final. 

Our editors:

Sam: Fears the looming recession pop renaissance. 

Rebecca: Gives some of these songs a lot more thought than they deserve. 

Boris: The claws are out and they have been sharpened. Disclaimer: His opinions and comments are his own. 

David: Someday, when we least expect it, he’ll shock the world by rating a song 10/10. Today is not that day. 

Let’s jump in!

Abor & Tynna – “Baller”

Sam: 6/10
Simple. Effective. Gets the job done. It would be nice to see Germany send something girl-bop adjacent after three years of sad boys and metal. 

Rebecca: 2/10
This track is definitely not suited for live vocals. As a club track it’s fine, but as a live performance I can already foresee about three hundred issues with the tempo, vocals, all of it. Watching the performance from the semi-final, I feel like I’m right—the vocalist (apologies, I’m not sure who is who in the duo) really struggles to keep up with the song at times, and the vocals suffer a lot. The chorus is very clearly not replicable live, as evidenced by the backing track, and ruins any immersion. It’s also just very jarring to my ears, and I’m not a huge fan of it in general. The staging also needs to be changed, because while a few artists have waved a selfie stick around on stage at Eurovision, it’s never ended well for any of them as far as I can recall.

Boris: 5/10
The best song in the selection is also the one with the worst live performance. Great! I understand why Raab pushed for “Baller” because it bangs, were it not that Abor and Tynna turn into “Abhor and Tynnitus” when they perform it. Have we learned nothing from Eurosong 2014 or Roxen’s Cherry Red? LET THE ARTISTS PICK THEIR OWN SONG, especially if the rest of A&T’s album also bangs.

David: 3/10
I think this might work very well within Germany, but not at all outside. Considering it is performed in German, then this could be awesome in German clubs. As a non-German, I do feel the German is a bother in this case, and probably would’ve been more interesting in English, cause the music does have a nice rhythm. Then again, vocally it comes out quite weak.

Highest score: 6 (Sam)
Lowest Score: 2 (Rebecca)
Total Points: 16/40
Average Score: 4.0/10

Benjamin Braatz – “Like You Love Me”

Sam: 6.5/10
Genuinely a very pretty song – and well-sung – but this genre is difficult to pull off at Eurovision and I’m not sure “Like You Love Me” will be the one to change that. 

Rebecca: 3/10
Benjamin looks extremely uncomfortable sitting amongst the audience for a full 45 seconds—almost as uncomfortable as the middle-aged guy sitting next to him looks. This is quite cute and inoffensive, but just hits more as an odd joke than a serious, sweet ballad. The vocals are a little shaky but not the worst; the staging is bizarre, with the giant kitchen chair and big LED Benjamin faces plastered over the background. I’m not loving this, but my bar for Germany is so far below the floor that I keep catching myself thinking “I guess it’s not that bad…”

Boris: 4.5/10
Benjamin takes up the same spot Lucas Bun did in Benifest earlier – He’s lowkey the ONLY chance Germany has to gather some jury votes, and yet… nobody seems to care about him? Lmao. To be fair, Benjamin’s staging is bad – awkward audience members into FOUR selfie backdrops…Still, “Like you love me” is an earnest little song by a man with a beautiful voice and while that is the smallest crumb, the teeniest blade of straw for me to cling to, it does make him the second best in this selection.

David: 1/10
I’m not gonna lie, but I was quickly just waiting for this song to end. The reason is, that it’s so bare boned, the guitar is the only instrument I hear, and I just want more sound. Does he have a good voice, yes he does, but also that, I don’t care about, because the lyrics just blank through me. If I can’t pay proper attention to a song, then I’m clearly not interested.

Highest score: 6.5 (Sam)
Lowest Score: 1 (David)
Total Points: 15/40
Average Score: 3.8/10

Cosby – “I’m Still Here”

Sam: 6/10
A little too much earnest trauma dumping for my taste, but musically I think it’s quite good. As long as she ditches the crawling around on the floor for the Final performance I think we have a contender.

Rebecca: 4/10
The song itself is decent, if a little on-the-nose, but the live performance is just on the wrong side of messy for me. I get that a song like this could benefit from some mess to reflect the idea of messy emotions, but the mess I’m seeing is more like when you dump something in the trash by accident and then have to weigh up if you want to fish around to find it again or not. The costuming and staging don’t feel like they match each other, let alone the concept of the song—cowboy fringes and butterflies are not something I would have put together, frankly. Marie has a good voice but it gets quite strained and lost in the second half, and the instrumentation becomes very sparse and lacklustre when I want it to climax.

Boris: 1.5/10
So, after Slovenia gave us a song that can more or less be described as “MY WIFE HAD CANCER,” Cosby give us a song which can be described as “MY DAD LEFT ME BEHIND.”  Okay! What is actually very sad about this is that you can’t quite tell by listening whether Cosby’s dad abandoned her when she was little, or whether he passed away recently, which are two COMPLETELY DIFFERENT moods to be swinging between. She’s emoting the former (anger) while singing the latter (grief). Klemen at least indisputably loves his wife and lists everything he admires about her, while Cosby… BLAMES HER DAD FOR DYING, HOW DARE YOU!!!! If you’re going to trauma dump and vie for sympathy votes, maybe… attempt to sound less self-centered? 

David: 4/10
It’s a cute rock-popsy song, which is raised from the emotional performance. I don’t mind it, but at the same time, it’s also quickly forgotten. The song overall struggles to leave a proper impression, despite the alright performance, but it just doesn’t stick with me. It’s quickly in through one ear, and out the other.

Highest score: 6.5 (Sam)
Lowest Score: 1.5 (Boris)
Total Points: 15.5/40
Average Score: 3.9/10

Feuerschwanz –  “Knightclub”

Sam: 4.5/10
This would have slayed in 2008, next to Latvia’s pirates and Dustin the Turkey. 

Rebecca: 4/10
I mean yeah, it goes pretty hard, and I laughed a few times, but where other “gag” entries feel like they lean into an idea or a personal brand, this one feels like a gimmick. They’re knights that have a club, and they like drinking alcohol. Cool, I guess. Beside the hard-rock nature of the music, the song as a whole is actually sort of plain and boring.

Boris: 1/10
The first rule of Knightclub is that you cringe during Knightclub. Of COURSE Germany would stan the Alternative Für Chefsache band, whose closest approximation is that awful Troll Flamingo band that popped up in MGP a few years ago. What categorizes Germany in Eurovision is embarrassment and mediocrity. I think Feuerschwanz will win Chefsache because they are both at once. Go ahead then, Raab. Pick it. And see HOW WELL IT TURNS OUT FOR YOU!!!

David: 4/10
Do I remember this, you bet! Am I entertained, not really. It’s effective, let’s get that straight, but lyrically, waaaay too simplistic with that constant repeat of “party in the knightclub”. It’s also far too gimmicky, as in, it really tries to be a “specifically written for Eurovision” song, which is a huge bother for me, since authenticity is sacrificed.

Highest score: 4.5 (Sam)
Lowest Score: 1 (Boris)
Total Points: 13.5/40
Average Score: 3.4/10

Julika – “Empress”

Sam: 6/10
Excellent live vocals, but the production needs a bit more sauce. It feels very stripped down when it has show-stopper potential. 

Rebecca: 4/10
Great vocals, moody staging, uninteresting song. With a title like “Empress” I was expecting something a lot more rich and triumphant, with a lot of brass and drums. The piano and single electric guitar riff makes it feel like a cheap, sad James Bond knockoff. There’s not a lot going on here, but there are enough decent pieces that a little bit of reworking could make something alright.

Boris: 4/10
Is this the moment to point out Germany’s TASTE issue, because there’s not much to say about JULIKA’s song. Julika sings well, she has an act, an artistic vision and her song is giving Una Voce Reject. “Empress” is musically flavourless and lyrically uninteresting. All of Chefsache is like this at the VERY best. It’s insipid music desperately polished up to resemble something, and STILL feels like a waste of time.

David: 2/10
A stunning voice and great control, but the song on the other hand… not stunning at all. Very simple and slow, not much is going on and my focus is gone missing eventually. I remember the voice, but that’s all, despite it’s in English and I’m able to understand, my brain just refuses to care enough, so hard to appreciate something, when the outcome is like that.

Highest score: 7 (Sam)
Lowest Score: 2 (David)
Total Points: 16/40
Average Score: 4/10

Leonora – “This Bliss”

Sam: 5/10
This specific brand of Sara Bareilles-esque piano pop had its moment in time, and that moment was in 2009. Is this the natural progression of the recession pop revival? Anyway, that high note at the end was rough. 

Rebecca: 5.5/10
It’s truly telling of the quality of this selection that one of the strongest entries is a simple and merely okay piano ballad. The vocals are nice, and the lyrics are actually pretty solid in their simplicity and straightforwardness. Also, a sweet jazzy saxophone solo at the end there! I actually said “oooohh” out loud and nodded approvingly. Unfortunately that saxophone won’t be live if it goes to Eurovision, so I can’t see it eliciting the same response, but still. This is not bad.

Boris: 4/10
Ah, Leonora coming through the Montesong-coded filler jazz. EXACTLY what we need in the final of the “We HAVE the Eurovision Winner” national selection. Germany deserves to be kicked from the Big Five and NQ if they think Leonora (or Julika, or The Great Leslie or any of the others) are even REMOTELY close to being EUROVISION TOP TWENTIERS. They have NO clue what makes other people tick, and it’s embarrassing.

David: 2/10
We’re in jazzy territory here, and that’s often an instant no go with me. It’s not that I mind the genre, but rather, it’s a genre I never pay much attention to, because I wish to be more entertained by the music I listen to. Sure, she has a strong vocal, but the overall melody is just slow and barely moving me.

Highest score: 5.5 (Rebecca)
Lowest Score: 2 (David)
Total Points: 16.5/40
Average Score: 4/10

Lyza – “Lovers on Mars”

Sam: 6/10
More like Lena on Mars. Is Germany behind the times or ahead of the curve? There’s a noticeable recession pop undercurrent to this entire selection, and “Lovers on Mars” is no exception with a literal “Ho!” at one point.

Rebecca: 3/10
This is… not that good. The vocals are not horrible but definitely leave me underwhelmed, and a lack of proper enunciation means I genuinely have no clue what is being sung. The melody reminds me of something very familiar, but for the life of me I haven’t  been able to figure out where I heard it. The staging is quite endearing, but crosses over very heavily with Ireland’s Emmy, who just objectively has a better song and so would drown this out at Eurovision.

Boris: 3.5/10
Temu Rosa Linn. This vaguely cute vehicle takes its chord progression from “Snap”, adds none of the embellishments that endeared “Snap” to the masses. This wouldn’t even be used as a background tune in the dankest pits of RedNote.

David: 5/10
It’s a fine country-pop vibe song, and she’s a charming singer. The song does shine when she sings it, so it’s a nice fit. In general, it’s not exactly a hit, but an inoffensive radio track. At the same time, I don’t care too much, but I do smile while listening to the song. I guess this is something that one could get used to.

Highest score: 6 (Sam)
Lowest Score: 3 (Rebecca)
Total Points: 17.5/40
Average Score: 4.4/10

Moss Kena – “Nothing Can Stop Love”

Sam: 5.5/10
The man can sing, but the ballad is cheesy. This vaguely feels like it could have been one of the fake Eurovision entries in the Will Ferrell movie. 

Rebecca: 5.5/10
I love the staging here. The pedestal with smoke billowing from the bottom is gorgeous, as is the soft lighting and gentle blue colour palette. Moss also has a remarkable voice that is very captivating to listen to. I just wish all this had a better song to make use of. It’s a generic ballad about how love is unstoppable, and no amount of great staging and impressive vocals can make me ignore that completely.

Boris: 2/10
Moss Kena is wearing a boa, and has a demon ballad. This is the sort of rotten nonsense Germany COULD pick if there was no Feuerschwanz to outcringe it. The demographic for this is the same type that claim “Tristeza” made them cry. The members of society that will lose us the war if and when Putin invades because they spend the entire war cowering in their bedroom dodging the recruiters. 

David: 4/10
Gorgeous voice! Man dude here can sing! Too bad, that I just don’t care for the song… at the moment. I wanna be harsh, just because the song doesn’t really reach me, but at the same time, my attention is on the lyrics, my attention is on the performance and of course on that voice. If the song perhaps had some more melody, than this could’ve been a game changer.

Highest score: 5.5 (Sam)
Lowest Score: 2 (Boris)
Total Points: 17/40
Average Score: 4.3/10

The Great Leslie – “These Days”

Sam: 7.5/10
Hear me out: this could be elevated. I see the vision. It’s fun and punky and punchy enough; give the staging a lot more oomph and this could not only qualify but do well at Eurovision. 

Rebecca: 5/10
Discount Måneskin is making me confused. I have no idea what he’s singing about. It’s got a pretty rockin’ guitar riff, though, so I’m kind of just vibing perplexedly the whole time this is on. They look like they’re having fun, though, so good for them.

Boris: 2/10
Temu Måneskin. Unfortunately also post-Eurovision Måneskin, whose recent output is a bare step below that of Baby Lasagna.

David: 3/10
Someone had a good practice session in the garage. I think so much more work could’ve been done on this song, rather than just going with “this sounds cool, lets stick with it”. It’s very messy and jumps a lot around in sound, and instead it’s just very awkward, and here I’m speaking about everything… lyrics, vocals, sound, you just name it.

Highest score: 7.5  (Sam)
Lowest Score: 2 (Boris)
Total Points: 17.5/40
Average Score: 4.4/10

Results:

We were a tough crowd this time around. Tied for first place are Lyza and The Great Leslie, but with an average score still under five points. See the final results below:

1. TIE: Lyza – “Lovers on Mars” and The Great Leslie – “These Days” | 4.4/10
2. Moss Kena – “Nothing Can Stop Love” | 4.3/10
3. Leonora – “This Bliss” | 4/10 (higher total points)
4. TIE: Abor & Tynna – “Baller” and Julika – “Empress” | 4/10
5. Cosby – “I’m Still Here” | 3.9/10
6. Benjamin Braatz – “Like You Love Me” | 3.8/10
7. Feuerschwanz –  “Knightclub”3.4/10

Catch the final of Chefsache 2025 today at 20:15 CET!

Let us know who #YOU want to see represent Germany at Eurovision 2025 on social media (@escunited), Discord, or at our forum.